When I’m Hot and You’re Not: Sexual Reconnection in Relationships2017-02-15T23:31:58+00:00

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When I'm Hot and You're Not: Sexual Reconnection
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When I’m Hot and You’re Not: Sexual Reconnection in Relationships

All long-term relationships have natural ebbs and flows in libido, but what happens when you go through long periods of time not wanting to have sex? The “I’m hot and you’re not” predicament plagues most couples at some point during their relationships. Some couples even mistakenly misread desire discrepancy as the end of the relationship.

Although passion is the most powerful source of divorce prevention, it is too often overlooked in counseling, education, and self-help resources. Eighty percent of divorcing couples say they still love each other. No percentage of divorcing couples say they are still passionate about each other! Passion will get you through the tough times and take you to the high times. Yet passion is often misunderstood and reduced to the bedroom.

A marriage full of passion is alive, energetic, moving, meaningful, conscious, and dynamic. Passion is the most common reason for marriage, i.e. couples want an ongoing life with a partner who is not only sensual and sexual, but interested and interesting. Having a passion for life is not only erotic, it’s attractive and enlivening. In fact, “libido” actually means life energy. If couples aren’t excited about each other, they are at risk because boredom is one of the greatest threats to marriage.

What often begins as ordinary sex differences—such as desire discrepancy—turns into overwhelming sex problems, causing many couples to give up on their relationships. In Hot Monogamy, Dr. Pat Love walks you through a step-by-step prevention program that gives you the insight and skills necessary to create loving, lasting sexual relationships and ward off the insidious threat of boredom that causes couples to grow apart.

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